We Interrupt This Hiatus to Bring You an Important Message

I’m breaking my self-imposed month of slackdom to, first of all, let you know that I’m on a self-imposed month of slackdom and to comment on a couple of stories making the news. Oh, and because I’m feeling snarky today.

The Pot Calling the Kettle Black

Starring Pete Rose as the pot:

NEW YORK -- Pete Rose thinks players who use steroids and other performance-enhancing drugs are "making a mockery" of baseball.

The career hits leader, banned by the sport for gambling, weighed in on the Mitchell report in an interview with Dennis Miller that was slated to air Wednesday night on VERSUS.

Uh huh. Kind of like betting on baseball games in which you were managing one of the teams. Don’t worry Pete, the juicers will get their due, if not now in the court of public opinion, then when it comes time for Hall of Fame selections. Ask Shoeless Joe Jackson how that’s working out. It could be that we may never see elected to the Hall of Fame: 1) the player with the third highest career batting average (Jackson), 2) the player with the most hits in a lifetime and 3) the player with the most career home runs. That’s because the Hall of Fame has certain standards. Unlike show business…

As if One Train Wreck Wasn’t Enough.

Britney Spears’s sixteen-year-old sister, Jamie Lynn, is “shocked” to find herself pregnant:

The star of the TV comedy series Zoey 101 told the magazine she was pregnant to her longtime boyfriend Casey Aldridge. "It was a shock for both of us, so unexpected,'' she said. "I was in complete and total shock and so was he.''

Sounds like Miss Spears, whose TV show will be added to the list of those my daughter won’t be allowed to watch, should probably have someone explain to her the birds and the bees. It probably shouldn’t be her mom, who thinks she’s only fertile outside of curfew:

Lynne Spears, already grandmother to Britney's young sons, said: "I didn't believe it because Jamie Lynn's always been so conscientious. She's never late for her curfew. I was in shock. I mean, this is my 16-year-old baby.''

No word on how this will affect Lynne Spears’s contract with book publisher Thomas Nelson to write a Christian parenting book. Doubtless she will emphasize what not to do in bringing up girls.

UPDATE: Thomas Nelson, realizing she’s not an expert in the topic she has chosen to write about, has wisely put the publication of Lynne Spears’s book on hold. Smart move.

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Part of the reason I’m taking this time off, aside from being really busy with other things, is to think about where I want to go with this blog, if anywhere at all. As part of the re-tooling, I’m considering adding more sarcasm. It comes easy to me and I’m really good at it. What do you think?