Bizzaro: When Celebrities Adopt

Oh God, please let this be a joke:

Unlikely Britney Rumors: Star To Adopt Chinese Twins & Is Planning Own Funeral
Having been deemed unfit to care for her own children, News of the World is claiming that Britney Spears is so desperate to have children in her life that she's been telling friends that she is in the final stages of adopting Chinese twins.

According to NOTW, friends feel that Britney decided to adopt the two six-year-old twins from China in a frantic bid to fill the void left by losing her sons to ex-hubby Kevin Federline.

Umm, couple of things:

1) At 25, Britney is too young to adopt from China, not to mention the fact that...

2) She's single, which is verboten under the new regulations and...

3) What about all that legal trouble, which would also scuttle any chance of adopting from China?